Hey, I've been following the blog faithfully! I can't believe you are voicing what I am going through as well. I'm reading and I'm thinking, "I can't believe she knows what this is like". You are a breath of fresh air in my blackness. You offer a little flicker of light in this hole. Please keep plodding forward. . .and hold out your hand for the rest of us to grab on to as we get mired up trying to make it to the other side.
~by Lee Smalley
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
The Other Side of the Street
Had a long discussion with Stan last Friday about where we/I am with the Biz. As I've elluded to in previous postings, I'm just suffering a bit of depression and finding it a pain to get up and out of the house in the mornings. Over the past four months I've been slowly figuring out that I'm not happy about where I am with my life right now. I could never figure out why I was feeling this now as opposed to last year. It hit me on Friday.
I was SO busy June through December of last year, I didn't have time to think about (in any depth anyway) where I was and how I got there. I was processing what had happened to me and knew I was healing slowly. But, I realize now that I was only going just under the surface in my thinking. Now, during these months in 2007 when our biz has been slow God has pushed me deeper. I find it quite interesting that God waited until now to push me. He knew I couldn't have handled it last year.
So, a lot of things going on right now and are slowly coming to light.
First of all...
...I've been trusting in the busy-ness!
I've been, not in a panic, but certainly anxiety-ridden these past months because of the slowness of the business. This "quiet" time has shown me that last year I was trusting in the busy-ness of the work. God, I believe, has been ok with that, but now He's saying to me..."okay let's get your trust placed where it should be."
Another thing...
...I am angry.
Having experienced grief in a powerful way because of losing my brother (died in 2003 unexpectedly from complications due to Diabetes), I realized what I am feeling right now is the same thing. Let me explain...
It's funny, but I didn't realize it until talking with Stan on Friday. Let this be a lesson to you all...talk out your thoughts/feelings to someone you trust. It forces you to SPEAK what you're feeling and it is amazing what comes out of one's mouth!
I didn't realize I was angry, but I am. And, this is one of the "seasons" in experiencing grief. We've been saying since way last April that it felt like we were experiencing a death and we knew that we were grieving for the loss of our jobs and the loss of the department in general. But, it didn't occur to me that I would go through the same "seasons" of grief.
So, I'm mad. Mad that I'm here right now in my life. I don't want to be. Thus, the reason for feeling depressed, not wanting to face the day, etc. And, this feeling has been amplified these past months because the work is slow and the anxiety of finances is high.
I'm not happy or feeling joy in my life at all right now. And, that sucks!
So, I'm processing all this right now. You all are traveling this road with me. It's all slowly coming together... figuring out why I feel the way I do, trying to understand why I don't feel content in where I am with my life, etc. It's been a slow journey, but I'm beginning to see some light and I'm slowly getting to the other side of the street.
Okay...so I'm mad. I get that now. I'm mad that what's happened to me has happened. It pisses me off. I'm angry at God, though....not the Army anymore. Isn't that lovely? I've transferred my anger to God! HA. So, I'm mad because this is hard, I'm not putting any money into our retirement accounts, I can't travel which is my heart's desire, etc. etc. I didn't ask to be here. And, when I look out in front of me, I see nothing...blackness.
Okay, so that makes me depressed and feel sorry for myself and all I want to do is eat and sleep. So, I've got this much figured out. I know this much.
What else I know (I've just figured this out since Friday)...is that I KNOW I'm in God's will for my life right now. I know I'm suppose to be running this company with Stan, and we're running it under His authority. So I'm good there. Which, in my mind, means that if that is true, then I should be content and have joy because I am right where I'm suppose to be. But, I don't feel or have those things in my spirit right now.
God is okay with that...He certainly, I believe, is glad...well, maybe that isn't the right word, but I think He is "okay" with me being where I am because He's trying to get me to the next level and without going through this muck, I can't reach it. Get it? An Ah-Ha moment for anyone besides me?
I refer back to that previous blog which references Revelations 12. The dragon is standing right in front of me (thus I only see blackness) waiting to devour this new thing that is about to be birthed in my life. He knows God is pushing me to the next level...this is huge for me. It is a level of trust that I've never experienced before in my life. Satan knows it and he's waiting. And waiting.
So, I'm on the brink of getting to the other side of the street...I'm almost there. But it's like wearing lead shackles on my ankles. Sometimes I have dreams where I'm trying to run, but my feet are like lead and I just can't move but in super slow motion. I just need to be patient, though...I think I need to move slow and process all of this...so it sinks in. And, sinks in deep so it becomes part of the foundation God is laying in my heart.
So, girlfriends...pray that I continue to move in the direction of the other side of the street, though it may be slow going. At least I'm moving in the right direction. A couple of months ago I was just standing on the other sidewalk looking across and having no desire to go anywhere.
I was SO busy June through December of last year, I didn't have time to think about (in any depth anyway) where I was and how I got there. I was processing what had happened to me and knew I was healing slowly. But, I realize now that I was only going just under the surface in my thinking. Now, during these months in 2007 when our biz has been slow God has pushed me deeper. I find it quite interesting that God waited until now to push me. He knew I couldn't have handled it last year.
So, a lot of things going on right now and are slowly coming to light.
First of all...
...I've been trusting in the busy-ness!
I've been, not in a panic, but certainly anxiety-ridden these past months because of the slowness of the business. This "quiet" time has shown me that last year I was trusting in the busy-ness of the work. God, I believe, has been ok with that, but now He's saying to me..."okay let's get your trust placed where it should be."
Another thing...
...I am angry.
Having experienced grief in a powerful way because of losing my brother (died in 2003 unexpectedly from complications due to Diabetes), I realized what I am feeling right now is the same thing. Let me explain...
It's funny, but I didn't realize it until talking with Stan on Friday. Let this be a lesson to you all...talk out your thoughts/feelings to someone you trust. It forces you to SPEAK what you're feeling and it is amazing what comes out of one's mouth!
I didn't realize I was angry, but I am. And, this is one of the "seasons" in experiencing grief. We've been saying since way last April that it felt like we were experiencing a death and we knew that we were grieving for the loss of our jobs and the loss of the department in general. But, it didn't occur to me that I would go through the same "seasons" of grief.
So, I'm mad. Mad that I'm here right now in my life. I don't want to be. Thus, the reason for feeling depressed, not wanting to face the day, etc. And, this feeling has been amplified these past months because the work is slow and the anxiety of finances is high.
I'm not happy or feeling joy in my life at all right now. And, that sucks!
So, I'm processing all this right now. You all are traveling this road with me. It's all slowly coming together... figuring out why I feel the way I do, trying to understand why I don't feel content in where I am with my life, etc. It's been a slow journey, but I'm beginning to see some light and I'm slowly getting to the other side of the street.
Okay...so I'm mad. I get that now. I'm mad that what's happened to me has happened. It pisses me off. I'm angry at God, though....not the Army anymore. Isn't that lovely? I've transferred my anger to God! HA. So, I'm mad because this is hard, I'm not putting any money into our retirement accounts, I can't travel which is my heart's desire, etc. etc. I didn't ask to be here. And, when I look out in front of me, I see nothing...blackness.
Okay, so that makes me depressed and feel sorry for myself and all I want to do is eat and sleep. So, I've got this much figured out. I know this much.
What else I know (I've just figured this out since Friday)...is that I KNOW I'm in God's will for my life right now. I know I'm suppose to be running this company with Stan, and we're running it under His authority. So I'm good there. Which, in my mind, means that if that is true, then I should be content and have joy because I am right where I'm suppose to be. But, I don't feel or have those things in my spirit right now.
God is okay with that...He certainly, I believe, is glad...well, maybe that isn't the right word, but I think He is "okay" with me being where I am because He's trying to get me to the next level and without going through this muck, I can't reach it. Get it? An Ah-Ha moment for anyone besides me?
I refer back to that previous blog which references Revelations 12. The dragon is standing right in front of me (thus I only see blackness) waiting to devour this new thing that is about to be birthed in my life. He knows God is pushing me to the next level...this is huge for me. It is a level of trust that I've never experienced before in my life. Satan knows it and he's waiting. And waiting.
So, I'm on the brink of getting to the other side of the street...I'm almost there. But it's like wearing lead shackles on my ankles. Sometimes I have dreams where I'm trying to run, but my feet are like lead and I just can't move but in super slow motion. I just need to be patient, though...I think I need to move slow and process all of this...so it sinks in. And, sinks in deep so it becomes part of the foundation God is laying in my heart.
So, girlfriends...pray that I continue to move in the direction of the other side of the street, though it may be slow going. At least I'm moving in the right direction. A couple of months ago I was just standing on the other sidewalk looking across and having no desire to go anywhere.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Joy in the Journey
If we claim to be children of God...then we should be in His will right now. (I hope all of you are).
So....
...are you seeing an enemy standing in front of you?
Do you feel your way is blocked and you can't see because of the darkness or fog surrounding you? Do you feel an enemy is standing in front of your destiny? Has all hell broke loose?
It's that dragon that sees what's inside of you. Seeing what changes are taking place in your life. And he knows God almighty has sown a seed in you. He knows it is about to be birthed into reality. And, he's standing there about to devour this thing. Satan stands before you.
But...
...the battle is the Lord's.
(Revelation 12)
So....
...are you seeing an enemy standing in front of you?
Do you feel your way is blocked and you can't see because of the darkness or fog surrounding you? Do you feel an enemy is standing in front of your destiny? Has all hell broke loose?
It's that dragon that sees what's inside of you. Seeing what changes are taking place in your life. And he knows God almighty has sown a seed in you. He knows it is about to be birthed into reality. And, he's standing there about to devour this thing. Satan stands before you.
But...
...the battle is the Lord's.
(Revelation 12)
FRIENDS
"As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friends." Proverbs 27:17
In reflecting over the past year and the wonderful G3 Summit last May, what comes to mind is the faithfullness and loyalty of my friends. I received so much encouragement, prayer, hugs, etc. from you all...you will never know how that has held me up and sustained me. But, some of you gave me more than just a "what I wanted or felt I needed to hear" type of message. Some of you had the courage to give me honesty and truthfulness.
xo
In reflecting over the past year and the wonderful G3 Summit last May, what comes to mind is the faithfullness and loyalty of my friends. I received so much encouragement, prayer, hugs, etc. from you all...you will never know how that has held me up and sustained me. But, some of you gave me more than just a "what I wanted or felt I needed to hear" type of message. Some of you had the courage to give me honesty and truthfulness.
I think we shy away so much from speaking the truth to our friends. I want you all to be my spiritual friends not just my girl friends. I want you to be my accountability friends. I've got to hear the truth about myself from someone!!! I challenge you to be that friend to me. Just remember to speak it in love...LOL!The mark of a biblical friend is that their freidnship draws you closer to Christ. They "sharpen" you and otivate you to do what is right. True friends tell you the truth and even trisk hurtin gyour feelings because they love you and have your best interests at heart (Proverbs 27:6).
Be careful in your choice of friends. Jesus chose His closest friends wisey. He did not look for perfect friends, but friends whose hearts were set to follow God. Strive to find godly friends who will challenge you to become the person God desires. When you have found them, be receptive to the way God uses them to help you become spiritually mature. Strive also to be the kind of friend that helps others become more like Christ.
Experiencing God Day by Day by Henry Blackaby & Richard Blackaby
xo
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Go Up and Possess It
"Look, the Lord your God has set the land before you;
go up and possess it, as the Lord God of your fathers
has spoken to you; do not fear or be discouraged."
Deuteronomy 1:21
One of the paradoxes of the Christian life is that God's gifts often require labor on our part. God brought the Israelites to the Promised Land and told them He was going to "give" it to them (Number 31.2). This sounded great to the Israelites until they realized that, with the gift, came battles against giants and fortified cities! Perhaps they assumed God was going to obliterate the inhabitants of the land before they entered. Instead, God said they would have to fight for it. They would not have to fight in their own strength, however; God would be present to fight for them. God would bring down the walls of cities, give them strategies to defeat their enemies, and empower their warriors to fight. The Israelites would have a divine advantage over anyone their fought, but they would still have to fight.
It would be wonderful if, when we become Christians, God would fill our minds with a complete knowledge of the BIble and with BIble verses already memorized. It would be easy if God would instill in us a delight for spending hours in prayer each day and a fearless desire to share our faith with others. But God doesn't relate to us that way. Instead, He gives us the free gift of His salvation and then tells us to "work out" our salvation in fear and trembling (Phil.2:12b). But don't be discouraged! God's gifts to you are perfect because, through them, He makes you perfect as well.
~written by Henry T. Blackaby & Richard Blackaby in "Experiencing God Day by Day"
go up and possess it, as the Lord God of your fathers
has spoken to you; do not fear or be discouraged."
Deuteronomy 1:21
One of the paradoxes of the Christian life is that God's gifts often require labor on our part. God brought the Israelites to the Promised Land and told them He was going to "give" it to them (Number 31.2). This sounded great to the Israelites until they realized that, with the gift, came battles against giants and fortified cities! Perhaps they assumed God was going to obliterate the inhabitants of the land before they entered. Instead, God said they would have to fight for it. They would not have to fight in their own strength, however; God would be present to fight for them. God would bring down the walls of cities, give them strategies to defeat their enemies, and empower their warriors to fight. The Israelites would have a divine advantage over anyone their fought, but they would still have to fight.
It would be wonderful if, when we become Christians, God would fill our minds with a complete knowledge of the BIble and with BIble verses already memorized. It would be easy if God would instill in us a delight for spending hours in prayer each day and a fearless desire to share our faith with others. But God doesn't relate to us that way. Instead, He gives us the free gift of His salvation and then tells us to "work out" our salvation in fear and trembling (Phil.2:12b). But don't be discouraged! God's gifts to you are perfect because, through them, He makes you perfect as well.
~written by Henry T. Blackaby & Richard Blackaby in "Experiencing God Day by Day"
Building the House
"Then he said to Him, "If Your presence does not go with us, do not being us up from here."
Exodus 33:15
It is possible to experience sucess and yet be void of God's presence. If success is what is important to you, you may be tempted to choose accomplishments over your relationship with God.
The Israelites' experience reveals that victory and great accomplishments are not necessarily a sign of God's presence. Do not assume that your good health, your profitable business or the growth of your ministry is due to the presence of God. It may be that you have inadvertently chosen success over your walk with the Lord. Moses wisely concluded that success, no matter how great, is not a substitute for fellowship with God. Moses' security came from his relationship with God. Success in the world's eyes is not a sign of God's blessing.
Do you value God's presence in your life more than the greatest achievements you could experience in the world?
Psalm 127:1
"Unless the Lord builds the house,
Its builders labor in vain."
Exodus 33:15
It is possible to experience sucess and yet be void of God's presence. If success is what is important to you, you may be tempted to choose accomplishments over your relationship with God.
The Israelites' experience reveals that victory and great accomplishments are not necessarily a sign of God's presence. Do not assume that your good health, your profitable business or the growth of your ministry is due to the presence of God. It may be that you have inadvertently chosen success over your walk with the Lord. Moses wisely concluded that success, no matter how great, is not a substitute for fellowship with God. Moses' security came from his relationship with God. Success in the world's eyes is not a sign of God's blessing.
Do you value God's presence in your life more than the greatest achievements you could experience in the world?
Psalm 127:1
"Unless the Lord builds the house,
Its builders labor in vain."
Monday, May 21, 2007
Happy Happy Joy Joy?
Okay, so my small group (Sharon hosts it at her home) is studying Romans. A real challenging book to understand and follow.
We're just on chapter 5 right now. Whew...what a chapter! How many times have we each read that chapter...go ahead and read it one more time!
I mentioned in a previous blog how I'm feeling a little blah, in a bit of a funk, as of late. Can't seem to find joy in where I am in my life.
v3. "Let us be full of joy now! Let us exult and triumph in our troubles and rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that pressure and affliction and hardship produce patient and unswerving endurance."
Oh, that's good.
v.4 "Endurance (fortitude) develops maturity of character (approved faith and tried integrity). And character of this sort produces the habit of joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation."
v5. " Such hope never disappoints or deludes or shames us, for God's love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit Who has been given to us."
So, verse 5 is interesting. This hope that is built on pressure, affliction and hardship doesn't disappoint, delude or shame us. Why? Because God's love has been poured into our hearts. Okay. What does that mean?
Here's a thought:
The word Paul uses for fortitude is hupomone which means more than endurance. It means the spirit which can overcome the world; it means the spirit which does not passively endure but which actively overcomes the trails and tribulations of life.
So, I feel I need to get off my passive butt and begin actively living through and overcoming my trials!!
We're just on chapter 5 right now. Whew...what a chapter! How many times have we each read that chapter...go ahead and read it one more time!
I mentioned in a previous blog how I'm feeling a little blah, in a bit of a funk, as of late. Can't seem to find joy in where I am in my life.
v3. "Let us be full of joy now! Let us exult and triumph in our troubles and rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that pressure and affliction and hardship produce patient and unswerving endurance."
Oh, that's good.
v.4 "Endurance (fortitude) develops maturity of character (approved faith and tried integrity). And character of this sort produces the habit of joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation."
v5. " Such hope never disappoints or deludes or shames us, for God's love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit Who has been given to us."
So, verse 5 is interesting. This hope that is built on pressure, affliction and hardship doesn't disappoint, delude or shame us. Why? Because God's love has been poured into our hearts. Okay. What does that mean?
Here's a thought:
And yet another thought:"When we are reconciled to God, we discover that He wants
not simply to enjoy this one-to-one relationship, but to enlist us in His
service in working for His kingdom. And that will bring all kinds of His
presence, even when it doesn't "feel" as though there's anything happening.
We mustn't imagine that our feeling of being close to God is a true index of the reality. Emotions often deceive. Paul is summoning us to understand the reality, the solid rock beneath the shifting sands of feeling.
Note
Paul doesn't say we celebrate our sufferings. We celebrate, he says, in our sufferings.
The Christian, like Abraham (whom Paul talks about in the previous chapter), is called again and again to "hope against hope (4.18). We look foolish in the world's eyes, waiting for something we can't see (8.25). but we don't appear foolish to ourselves, because we are sustained by something deeper, something wihch grows directly out of the gift of "peace with God", out of the reconciliation which Paul describes in a few verses later."
Paul for Everyone by Tom Wright
The word Paul uses for fortitude is hupomone which means more than endurance. It means the spirit which can overcome the world; it means the spirit which does not passively endure but which actively overcomes the trails and tribulations of life.
So, I feel I need to get off my passive butt and begin actively living through and overcoming my trials!!
Monday, May 14, 2007
From Carla...
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. God is using your words to speak to me. I have always had trouble putting my thoughts on paper, but I did want you to know that I enjoy hearing from you.
I just finished watching "Extreme Makeover" on ABC. What an opportunity that cast has in making a difference in people's lives. I just started thinking about all of the opportunities I have daily to make a difference in someone's life. No, I can't build them a new home or pay off their mortgage; but I can be sure to say thank you, make sure my words are kind, and SMILE.
I just finished watching "Extreme Makeover" on ABC. What an opportunity that cast has in making a difference in people's lives. I just started thinking about all of the opportunities I have daily to make a difference in someone's life. No, I can't build them a new home or pay off their mortgage; but I can be sure to say thank you, make sure my words are kind, and SMILE.
Friday, May 11, 2007
Great prayer from Beverly...
Lord - "Please teach me number my days and juggle my time in order to glorify You through the people you have raised to come along side my journey" amen
Thursday, May 10, 2007
HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!!
Okay girls...remember one year ago about this time we all gathered together at the wonderful Camp Hoblitzelle and were absolutely swept away by the moving of the Holy Spirit and the wonderful spirit of sisterhood?! Well, happy anniversary.
Hope this past year has been one of great reflection and growth spiritually. I look forward with great anticipation to the next G3 Summit October 5-7, 2007. MARK YOUR CALENDARS NOW. Hold on to that date and don't let anything/one keep you from the blessings God has in store.
Hope this past year has been one of great reflection and growth spiritually. I look forward with great anticipation to the next G3 Summit October 5-7, 2007. MARK YOUR CALENDARS NOW. Hold on to that date and don't let anything/one keep you from the blessings God has in store.
OCTOBER 5-7, 2007
Camp Hoblitzelle
G3 SUMMIT 2007
More Thoughts on Spiritual Warfare
Matthew 16:21-23
Peter became an "obstacle" to Jesus' destiny. Jesus said, not to Peter but the supernatural forces that was using Peter...He spoke to the spirit, not the person, "Get thee behind me Satan."
Every God-given destiny or dream has an enemy. People can impact your destiny, but people are not, stricky put, the enemy of your destiny. You will encounter very few people in life that knowingly fight against the will of God. Peter didn't knowingly fought against the will of teh Father for the son. Peter was sincere in his comments, but there was a larger dynamic at work. Peter didn't perceive it, he was responding based on his emotions and preconceived ideas.
Spiritual realities impact natural realities. See Revelations 12. On earth the dragon is on earth to devour the baby. Satan is "disguised" as a dragon. But, while this "natural" battle was waging, in Heaven Michael and the angels were fighting a spiritual battle. What happens in the spirit dictates what happens in the natural world.
See Exodus 17:9-11 In the valley the soldiers has real spears and swords and armor...but on the mountain Moses prevailed in prayer (lifting one's hands meant praising and praying to God) and the Israelites persisted and won. Notice...both battles had to be fought. Moses wasn't just on the mountain praying and Joshua and the soldiers were back laying in their tents. They had to show up and swing those swords.
If you only perceive what's going on with human eyes and make decisions, as well intentioned as they may be, based only on the natural, only on the physical realties, if you make those decisions not walking in the spirit, you will not win the battle. You cannot birth a spiritual destiny strickly through the arm of the flesh.
Now, God doesn't want us to be paranoid and think that everything that happens in the natural is because some demon somewhere is doing something. A lot of people give demons a lot more power than what they have. But there are times and places you will experience a natural circumstance that involves a spritual battle.
Don't get distracted by human reactions.
Five things you need to know.
1). Every destiny has an enemy.
2). People are not your problem.
3). Spiritual realities impact natural realities.
-Faith is your friend...that doesn't mean blindly ignoring realty. It's not the power of positive thinking.
-The Word is your weapon
-Angels are your ally (II Kings 6)
4). Timing is everything. Satan never fights fair and will kick you when you're weakest. But, God's timing is perfect. God chooses the time and the place of the battle and the victory.
5). The battle IS the Lord's. You cannot fulfil your destiny without supernatural intervention. It doesn't matter how the opposition comes...the enemy comes at you at so many ways...sublte or overwhelming or it could be tormenting thoughts in your head, etc. You are not alone. See I Samuel 17.
Peter became an "obstacle" to Jesus' destiny. Jesus said, not to Peter but the supernatural forces that was using Peter...He spoke to the spirit, not the person, "Get thee behind me Satan."
Every God-given destiny or dream has an enemy. People can impact your destiny, but people are not, stricky put, the enemy of your destiny. You will encounter very few people in life that knowingly fight against the will of God. Peter didn't knowingly fought against the will of teh Father for the son. Peter was sincere in his comments, but there was a larger dynamic at work. Peter didn't perceive it, he was responding based on his emotions and preconceived ideas.
Spiritual realities impact natural realities. See Revelations 12. On earth the dragon is on earth to devour the baby. Satan is "disguised" as a dragon. But, while this "natural" battle was waging, in Heaven Michael and the angels were fighting a spiritual battle. What happens in the spirit dictates what happens in the natural world.
See Exodus 17:9-11 In the valley the soldiers has real spears and swords and armor...but on the mountain Moses prevailed in prayer (lifting one's hands meant praising and praying to God) and the Israelites persisted and won. Notice...both battles had to be fought. Moses wasn't just on the mountain praying and Joshua and the soldiers were back laying in their tents. They had to show up and swing those swords.
If you only perceive what's going on with human eyes and make decisions, as well intentioned as they may be, based only on the natural, only on the physical realties, if you make those decisions not walking in the spirit, you will not win the battle. You cannot birth a spiritual destiny strickly through the arm of the flesh.
Now, God doesn't want us to be paranoid and think that everything that happens in the natural is because some demon somewhere is doing something. A lot of people give demons a lot more power than what they have. But there are times and places you will experience a natural circumstance that involves a spritual battle.
Don't get distracted by human reactions.
Five things you need to know.
1). Every destiny has an enemy.
2). People are not your problem.
3). Spiritual realities impact natural realities.
-Faith is your friend...that doesn't mean blindly ignoring realty. It's not the power of positive thinking.
-The Word is your weapon
-Angels are your ally (II Kings 6)
4). Timing is everything. Satan never fights fair and will kick you when you're weakest. But, God's timing is perfect. God chooses the time and the place of the battle and the victory.
5). The battle IS the Lord's. You cannot fulfil your destiny without supernatural intervention. It doesn't matter how the opposition comes...the enemy comes at you at so many ways...sublte or overwhelming or it could be tormenting thoughts in your head, etc. You are not alone. See I Samuel 17.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
People are not my problem
Greetings my friends. It has been a while since I've "blogged" you guys. Life seems to come at me so fast that I feel like I'm just hanging on for dear life. The "biz" is going good. Learning a lot about trust. I feel I do trust the Lord, but I've been in a funk for the last six months or so...been trying to figure out what that's about. I know I'm still healing, but I am not "happy" in the sense that I love getting up the in the morning and am eager to start each day. I'm sure you all have that issue as well now and again, but I've been battling that feeling for many months. It's a depression I can't figure out...like a low level fever that just hangs on and drags you down.
Actually, I just in the past week or so have been seeing this issue in a different light and am slowly beginning to understand myself and where I'm at right now. You know, in my 30s I learned about the world and in my 40s I'm learning about myself. Praise God He knows me better than myself, because it's been crazy trying to figure me out!
Anyway, I should have entitled this blog "True Confessions." LOL. What I wanted to talk about is this little light dawning in my being regarding all this I am going through...hoping it may help you in some way.
A couple weeks ago my Pastor gave a sermon on this subject, "People are not your problem." He talked about how if we want to know and experience God's destiny for our lives we are, in a sense, like a woman giving birth...we have to be willing to push.
You have to "breath." In the Bible "spirit" means "breath." You have to intentionally "breath" or seek the "spirit" of God (study His word, pray, etc).
There is always an enemy to your destiny. You will not be able to seize your destiny without overcoming the enemy. THEREFORE, people are not your problem. See II Corinthians 4:16-18.
Spiritual realities impact natural realities. What happens in the spirit dictates what happens inthe natural world.
See Exodus 17:9-11.
Light bulb moment (the light came on over my head): I've been living my life coming from the wrong perspective. I am not a physical being living in a spiritual world. I am a SPIRITUAL being living in a natural world.
Now...both battles have to be fought...spiritual and natural. But, praise God, the battle is the Lord's!! If you doing the Lord's will, the Lord will fight your battle. See I Samuel 17.
NOTE: Satan NEVER fights fair. You should expect him to kick you when you're down. And, you can expect him to attack you at your weakest.
Soooo...the struggles or conflicts in your life are't so much about people...it's about spiritual warfare. When someone is rude and a snob to you in the checkout line, it's more about what is happening on a spiritual level, not that that person is just a jerk. If we could just see the world in which we live from a spiritual perspective...we would be transformed. Isn't that how Jesus saw the world when He was here? He saw the woman at the well from the inside out. He saw Peter on a spiritual level when He rebuked him (Satan) in Matthew 16:21-23. He saw the Chief Priests, the Temple Guards, Pilate, Herod and the soldiers at Golgotha from a spiritual perspective. What if He allowed himself to see all this from His human side? When someone offends us or hurts our feelings...we automatically want to strike back or wish them ill-will. We react from a natural sense. What if we were to react from our spiritual being. Hmmmm....I'm convinced we would approach situations like this...life in general...from a 180! Can you imagine how that person would react if your response was from the Holy Spirit within you?
What happens in the spiritual world (or on the spiritual level) dictates what happens in the natural world.
So, I'm learning that I'm in the middle of a spiritual war...my funk is spiritual in nature...I KNOW I am right where God wants me to be...I should be waking up every morning excited about where I am and what I am doing in my life. I realize the hurt and pain I experienced last year is still with me and I am healing...I give myself that. But, on a whole other level Satan is attacking what God has done in my life and is doing. Pray that my spirit will be strengthen and will overcome.
Actually, I just in the past week or so have been seeing this issue in a different light and am slowly beginning to understand myself and where I'm at right now. You know, in my 30s I learned about the world and in my 40s I'm learning about myself. Praise God He knows me better than myself, because it's been crazy trying to figure me out!
Anyway, I should have entitled this blog "True Confessions." LOL. What I wanted to talk about is this little light dawning in my being regarding all this I am going through...hoping it may help you in some way.
A couple weeks ago my Pastor gave a sermon on this subject, "People are not your problem." He talked about how if we want to know and experience God's destiny for our lives we are, in a sense, like a woman giving birth...we have to be willing to push.
You have to "breath." In the Bible "spirit" means "breath." You have to intentionally "breath" or seek the "spirit" of God (study His word, pray, etc).
There is always an enemy to your destiny. You will not be able to seize your destiny without overcoming the enemy. THEREFORE, people are not your problem. See II Corinthians 4:16-18.
Spiritual realities impact natural realities. What happens in the spirit dictates what happens inthe natural world.
See Exodus 17:9-11.
Light bulb moment (the light came on over my head): I've been living my life coming from the wrong perspective. I am not a physical being living in a spiritual world. I am a SPIRITUAL being living in a natural world.
Now...both battles have to be fought...spiritual and natural. But, praise God, the battle is the Lord's!! If you doing the Lord's will, the Lord will fight your battle. See I Samuel 17.
NOTE: Satan NEVER fights fair. You should expect him to kick you when you're down. And, you can expect him to attack you at your weakest.
Soooo...the struggles or conflicts in your life are't so much about people...it's about spiritual warfare. When someone is rude and a snob to you in the checkout line, it's more about what is happening on a spiritual level, not that that person is just a jerk. If we could just see the world in which we live from a spiritual perspective...we would be transformed. Isn't that how Jesus saw the world when He was here? He saw the woman at the well from the inside out. He saw Peter on a spiritual level when He rebuked him (Satan) in Matthew 16:21-23. He saw the Chief Priests, the Temple Guards, Pilate, Herod and the soldiers at Golgotha from a spiritual perspective. What if He allowed himself to see all this from His human side? When someone offends us or hurts our feelings...we automatically want to strike back or wish them ill-will. We react from a natural sense. What if we were to react from our spiritual being. Hmmmm....I'm convinced we would approach situations like this...life in general...from a 180! Can you imagine how that person would react if your response was from the Holy Spirit within you?
What happens in the spiritual world (or on the spiritual level) dictates what happens in the natural world.
So, I'm learning that I'm in the middle of a spiritual war...my funk is spiritual in nature...I KNOW I am right where God wants me to be...I should be waking up every morning excited about where I am and what I am doing in my life. I realize the hurt and pain I experienced last year is still with me and I am healing...I give myself that. But, on a whole other level Satan is attacking what God has done in my life and is doing. Pray that my spirit will be strengthen and will overcome.
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