Every Six Steps...

There's so much to tell about these days. Life is crazy...I eat, sleep, work, eat, sleep, work. I fall into bed exhausted, but then have insomnia because I'm so stressed and anxiety ridden. Worried. That's all it is...being worried.

I know. You're asking, "But why are you worried? God has brought you here. Do you think He would just leave you here?" Of course not. But, the eyes are on the storm...the wind and the waves. Not on Christ. So, one begins to sink.

I've been learning a lot lately. God is speaking...wish I could live what He's saying. Constantly struggling with my emotions. Depression. Funny. I thought Satan was hitting me hot and heavy between 3/31 and 6/2. I was in the Word every day digging through Scripture, praying and writing pages and pages in my journal. But, now...at this time is when Satan is hitting the hardest. Playing on my anxieties, my fears, my feelings of inadequacey. Whew...now more than ever I should be writing in my journal and praying and seeking His face.

It occurs to me that surely God wants me to bring my daily concerns to Him. But, more than that...more than pleading with Him about this concern or that problem, He wants me to seek His face. He wants me to want more of Him. A couple Sundays ago the Pastor talked about Ezekial and the bones. God asked him what he saw and he said it was just a bunch of bones. This is what I'm seeing...and feeling...and hearing.

Don't say what you feel.
Don't say what you see.
Don't say what you hear.

Don't rely on what the world is showing, telling, hearing. Lord, give me spiritual eyes, ears and emotional strength. Let me see it, hear it and feel it all from your perspective. Don't let the world dictate how I feel.

Don't pray what you see.
Don't pray what you feel.
Don't pray what you hear.
But, seek God. Period. Seek God.

And, (oh Lee this is for you)...God's best MO is working in the silence (Elijah-I Kings 19). My priority should be seeking to be in His presence. In His presence I gain His perspective. Then what I see, what I hear, what I feel does not overwhelm or control.

Then another Sunday, I learned more about grace.

God gives grace through people around us. Grace for change flows through people. External to the internal. You and I have the authority to make a difference. Matthew 10: 8b

Jamee gave me grace this weekend. Joanne Senft (many of you know her) gave me grace this week. April and Jim Taylor gave me grace last Thursday. Sharon and Bob, ( you know Sharon...Bob is in my small group) gave me grace last Thursday evening. God is speaking and encouraging through so many people.

Thanks to God for these lovely grace givers.

Then this last Sunday came the "Every Six Steps." II Samuel 6:13. King David, this man who loved God so much, who just wanted more than anything to be closer to Him...to know Him...was moving the Ark to it's new home in the City of David...and every six steps he sacrificed a bull and fatten calf. Every six steps. David was passionate about wanting to be in a relationship with God, to be in His presence. He was serious about it. Whatever it cost. And, he felt it had to cost him something. Can you imagine how many bull and fattened calves were needed for this?

How serious am I?
How serious are you?

Sure we sing "All there is of me, Lord." But what does "giving one's all" really mean?

And, so it begins...

Okay girls. Stan and I did it. We signed a lease today for office space. We've been duking it out for over a month with this landlord even getting to a point where we started looking elsewhere because they were being really bullheaded about some things. But, in the end they caved!!! HA! And, with great fear and trepidation we signed our lives away today for three years.

For those who live in Dallas: 1111 Mockingbird Lane, Suite 253, corner of Mockingbird Ln and I-35...just down the street from the Army!

Can't believe it. FINALLY! Now the landlord has a lot of work to do that we've asked for regarding the space...painting, carpeting, new ceiling tiles/blinds/doors, etc., etc. Our Agent wrote in the lease that we want to take possesion on September 15...but he's not sure they'll get all the refurbishing done by then. Let's hope so. This is all very exciting, but now here we are waiting again.

Business is good. Steady. But, September is looking thin. Worried about that, but we remember that's how it was at the Army. Never had jobs more than a month/six-weeks out.

Hope you all are well.

On another note, talked with Jamee yesterday. She will be in Dallas this week. She and Jim are moving Jim's daughter, Mary, to North Carolina! She'll be joining some police academy up there now. She just wasn't making it on her own. This concerns Jamee and Jim, as you might suspect. Keep them all in your prayers as Jim/Jamee try to help Mary become solid in her lifestyle and accountability.

Georgette Does Dallas

Well, last night was a wonderful evening of food and laughter. Georgette stayed with Mark and Susan Brown (my old boss). I invited Susan to join us. Carrie met us at Gloria's. Sure did miss the rest of you. We had the best time. Fish tacos, quesadillas, tacos al carbon....yum-yum.

I've been meaning to tell you all that Georgette's brother died a little over a month ago. You remember she spoke of him at the Summit. You may want to just drop her a note of remembrance. She doing okay in that regard.

She claims she's going to be reconnecting to the email world in the next month. So, I'll pass on her email when I receive it.

We talked about each and every one of you and prayed for you all as well.

Cindy